Groom Me No Groom!

I am neither too ugly nor too beautiful. Neither too poor nor too rich. Neither too clever nor too stupid. Neither too Yichusidck nor too Non Yichusdick. I am average. I never expected to be the first girl of my class to be engaged, but neither did i expect to be the last. I expected to do what I do best - be average…

I now find myself further down from average…. I find myself at the bottom of the heap. One of the last, schlepping along from wedding to wedding, from hall to hall….
The subtitle of my Blog (teenage) no longer applies to me. In truth it probably only just about applied to me when I started this Blog. I now find myself with another birthday approaching and I sit back and think……………………………………..

I AM HAPPY! I am happy with where I'm up to in my life, with what I am doing . I AM IN NO RUSH!

Shocked? I have most certainly shocked myself.

The point here is that I wish people would stop thinking that marriage is a bed of roses, a solution, to get out the house. Or even free nookie…. None of these are reasons to get married. I would never say my life is 100% ideal, and I believe that I have plenty of things that I need to work on. But a person CAN NOT come into a marriage with problems, hoping that their spouse will solve them.

At the moment, I have no reason to get married.

The cynicism in me has always been prominent, and now is no different. I see so much unhappiness around me. She had a baby too soon; she had to wait so long. His wife wants him to stay in Kollel, his wife wants him to leave Kollel so she can go shopping all day. Or they just simply do not match.
There is no way that I can guarantee that my marriage will be perfect, in fact no marriage is. But I do believe that I should go into it being the best person that I can be. And a person that is desperate to say 'I do' to the next shmerel the shadchan suggests because of peer pressure, the big wedding, or even to escape her father, is in my personal opinion, an idiot and most definitely not the best person they can be or become.

You see in this case, I am not average. In fact if I may be so blunt, I think of myself at the top of the class. I love myself for thinking this way. I love myself for not submitting to the pressures of my peers….

But more than me, I LOVE one person, for making me realize it….